Saturday, December 31, 2011

Ten 2011 Fashion things




The triumph of ‘heritage’ in menswear. Five years ago it was only Oi Polloi (see above) and End Clothing pushing the workwear-meets-preppy-meets-scally look. Now, everyone, from flash East London boys on the pull in Shoreditch to Mancunian rats hanging around the forecourt at Old Trafford, looks like they’ve walked off the pages of a J. Crew catalogue.

Girls suddenly styling their hair into bouncy, soft buns – and looking like Princess Anne circa 1974 in the process.

Collaborations which should tick all the right boxes actually ticking none. I’m thinking of you, Banana Republic vs Mad Men.


Blokes finally, finally ditching the Beckham '99 spiky mullet in favour of World War II side partings and mod crops. See Barton, J (above).

Moustaches everywhere. Movember has made a fair proportion of country’s males look like Tosh Lyons-style bent coppers from the early ’80s. See Barton, J (above).



The domination of The Only Way is Essex (above) played out every Saturday night as hordes of young men go out looking like a mix between Tarzan and Linda Lusardi.

Women’s magazines trying to pinpoint a ’90s revival – without actually being able to work out what a ’90s revival would look like.



Three-piece suits. Decently dressed chaps like Gary Barlow, Dermot O’Leary and Daniel Craig (above) may have donned them, but the fact remains that a one-colour, three-piece makes you look like a walking curtain – or a bourbon-addicted boss from some 1976 battle-of-the-sexes comedy.

Alarmingly shit hi-top trainers spreading from the gay community to fat lads who work in garages. Stop it, now.



T-shirts which reference the activities of young men of the late 1970s being worn by their sons. See brands like 80s Casuals (above) and Northern Boys Club for proof.


3 comments:

  1. Ste Connor5:37 pm

    Heritage - even Ben Sherman are now, albeit somewhat cack-handedly, trying to flog that particular dead dobbin alongside other such "fashion" luminaries as *shudders* Farah.

    The words "death" & "knell" hurtle to the forefront of one's mind.

    An apple in yer ear Teasy-Weasy - salut!

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  2. Anonymous11:47 pm

    Dean Moriarty writes.....

    1) Get to fuck with yer heritage shout soft lad. The jacket in the top pic is shite. It might pass if it was all green, as all outerwear must be one colour only. The only exception being if it was worn by anyone under the age of 10.
    2) Princess Anne looks like a horse, she wears a mane.
    3) Never collaborate, always oppose!
    4) Joey Barton isn't kidding anyone, the Phony Huyton Meff!
    5) Muzzies are pure Texan kid. Fuck charity!
    6) Them quilts in pic 3 spend more time in front of the mirror, and more money on pampering than the good wife. And they claim to be straight?!
    7) 90's Revival? I can't remember, the drugs were too good!
    8) You're right, three piece suits are for twats, and all three nominees fit the bill!
    9) Using the word trainers proves you're not a Scouser! The word is trainees, always has been, and always will be. Fuck the readership!
    10) Casuals on a t-shirt is an anachronism. You can't buy your way into an ideology. It HAS to be lived!
    11) Teasy-Weasy?! What a beaut!!!

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  3. Anonymous4:35 pm

    Not displaying comments...oh dear.

    ReplyDelete